Being an amazing sitter isn’t just about having the bedtime routine down pat, recalling favorite snack, or keeping everyone safe. It’s also about making kids feel comfortable, understood, and totally excited to spend time with you. Of course, each and every child is different, but if little ones could hand their caregiver a cheat sheet before they walked through the door, it’s likely to look a whole lot like this. Here’s what kids wish their sitters knew:
1. Get to know what I’m into
Whether it’s pterodactyls, playing piano, or Pokémon, kids love sharing the things they light them up. Ask a few questions about what they love to do, which books are their favorites, or how they spend their time. Not only is it a great way to break the ice, but it provides a roadmap for activities, games, or conversations you might have. And be sure to recall those details for next time. Consider adding a note in your phone to remind you. That way, the next time you care for them, you can start with a simple “How did your basketball game go?” to show a child that you were truly listening to what they had to say. Extra credit? You could even ask a parent about their child’s current interests and favorite activities ahead of time so you’ll have some instant ice-breakers when you arrive.
2. Please play with me
Often the best thing you can bring to a babysitting job is your undivided attention. From building a blanket fort to playing Uno to sketching out a silly animal or sharing some interesting trivia, being engaged transforms “this person is babysitting me” into time that children genuinely enjoy and look forward to doing again. This also means minimizing time on your phone while caring for kids, unless you’re using it to communicate with parents.
3. Offer me some choices
Kids are faced with plenty of decisions that are made for them. Why not give them some small, age-appropriate options to give them some control? Simple questions like “Do you want to draw with chalk or build Legos?” or “which book should we read at bedtime?” go a long way toward helping kids connect with you and feel autonomous. Sure, parents’ rules still come first, but within those boundaries, a little choice is apt to go a long way.
4. Give me some time to warm up
Some kids might want to introduce you to every stuffed animal they own or give you a house tour within five minutes while others take a little time. If a child you’re caring for is quiet, shy, or hesitant when you arrive, stay calm and don’t take it personally. Offer some space and look for low-pressure ways to connect, such as sitting nearby while they color or simply letting them know you’re there when they’re ready.
5. Learn how things work in my house
Each family has its own routines. Perhaps shoes come off at the door and dessert only happens after dinner. Maybe a specific song can’t be skipped before bedtime or a family pet is not allowed on the couch. Be sure to check with parents about the important details before they leave, including meals, screen time, routines, house rules, allergies, and bedtime. Following a familiar routine can help kids know what to expect as well as make the transition from parent to sitter feel a little easier.
6. Listen when I talk to you
Who doesn’t want to feel heard? If a child tells you they’re frightened of the dark or they can’t stand when different foods on the plate touch, pay attention. You don’t have to give in to every request, but it’s helpful to can acknowledge and validate how they’re feeling. Even something like “I hear you. Let’s figure out what we can do,” will make a big difference. If a child shares something related to their health, safety, or well-being, take it seriously. Follow the family’s instructions for communicating concerns.
7. Read my energy
Just like adults, kids have varying levels of energy. One day a child might be ready for an American Ninja Warrior-style obstacle course while another she might want to read quietly. Tune in to their energy and adjust when you can. Try having a few different kinds of activities ready to go: something active, something creative, and something quiet. (Find some screen-free activities here.) Having some ideas in each category will give you options when moods and energy levels change.
8. It’s okay to be silly
Even though you’re the person in charge, you don’t have to be serious all the time. Share your best Elmo voice at story time. Do the worm during a dance party. Invite stuffed animals to have snack with you. It’s possible to maintain boundaries and still have fun. In fact, those goofy little moments may be some of the things kids remember most.
9. Keep routines consistent
Being the favorite, fun sitter doesn’t mean all the rules evaporate when the parents walk out the door. Kids might test boundaries, especially with someone new. By staying calm and consistent with the family’s expectations, kids will feel more secure because they know what to expect.
10. Tell my parents about the good stuff
When parents get home, they obviously need to know the basics: how kids slept, ate, and behaved. But be sure to include the fun details. Talk about the hilarious expression he did or the amazing drawing she created. Compliment how well the kids did at bedtime or finishing homework. Sharing small tidbits will give parents a glimpse into their child’s time with you and shows that you were engaged and invested in them.
Little things make a big difference
Remember: You don’t need fancy activities or a perfect plan to be a sitter that children love spending time with. Stay curious about who they are. Listen. Play. Respect their routines. Give them your attention. And leave some room for silliness. Becoming a family’s go-to sitter isn’t just about building a relationship with the parents. It’s also about building a strong connection with the kids. When children feel comfortable being themselves around you, you’re off to an amazing start.
