There’s no one right way to be a parent. You know your child’s needs best, and what works for one family might not work for another. Staying true to yourself and your family’s values should always be the first priority, and the parenting choices you make might evolve as your children’s needs change.
But becoming a parent is a very new (and sometimes overwhelming) experience. So it can be helpful to have a starting place, to understand how other families have approached raising their children in a healthy, nurturing environment.
Let’s take a look at the different parenting styles that have developed over the years. Explore what feels authentic to you, and which techniques will best support your child’s emotional, social, and cognitive growth.
Why Are Parenting Styles So Important?
As a parent, you’re one of the most influential figures in your child’s life, and the way you choose to raise them makes a huge impact. Psychologists and other experts claim that different types of parenting styles can affect children’s lives when it comes to things like:
- Academic achievement and motivation
- Mental health and well-being
- Self-esteem
- Social relationships
- Romantic relationships
Your parenting style shapes how your child understands the world, showing them how to view themselves and build relationships with their family, classmates, and more.
The Different Parenting Styles
Authoritative Parenting Style
One of the most widely recognized and recommended parenting styles is authoritative parenting. This approach emphasizes the importance of setting clear boundaries and rules while maintaining open communication and nurturing a warm, supportive environment. Authoritative parents encourage independence and autonomy while also providing guidance and support. They listen to their children’s opinions, reasoning, and emotions, fostering a sense of self-esteem and self-discipline.
Examples of authoritative parenting might include:
- Making a chore chart, giving your child choices for which tasks they’d like to be responsible for
- Upholding consistent and fair discipline when expectations aren’t met
- Saying no when necessary
- Allowing your children to independently explore their own ambitions and interests while supporting them with the tools they need to succeed
Positive Parenting Style
Positive parenting is another effective style that focuses on nurturing a strong parent-child relationship through positivity and understanding. This approach promotes respectful communication, active listening, and using positive reinforcement to encourage desirable behavior. Positive parenting emphasizes modeling appropriate behavior, problem-solving skills, and teaching empathy and emotional intelligence. By maintaining a nurturing and supportive environment, positive parenting fosters the development of self-confidence and healthy relationships.
Examples of positive parenting might include:
- Starting each day by saying an affirmation with your child
- Creating a star chart that awards your child a sticker for desirable behavior
- Celebrating a job well done, like grabbing an ice cream cone after your child hits a home run at their baseball game
- Crafting vision boards together to model what it looks like to set goals, and encourage children to share their own
Positive Parenting For Military Families
The challenges and stressors associated with service can impact parenting styles, and positive parenting has been found to be particularly beneficial for military families. This parenting style fosters resilience and promotes healthy coping mechanisms for both parents and children. Maintaining open lines of communication, consistency, and offering emotional support can help mitigate the effects of separation, frequent moves, and other challenges faced by military families.
Permissive Parenting Style
In contrast to authoritative parenting, permissive parenting takes a more relaxed and lenient approach. Permissive parents tend to have few rules and regulations and provide minimal guidance and discipline. This parenting style often allows children to make their own decisions without much parental involvement. While permissive parenting can foster creativity and independence, it can also lead to inconsistent boundaries and potential difficulties with self-control and responsibility.
Examples of permissive parenting might include:
- Letting children choose their own bedtime
- Allowing children to choose whatever they’d like for dinner
- Giving children free rein to make their own social plans, without requiring them to check in regularly
- Minimal academic oversight or rules about when homework should get done
You Don’t Have To Go It Alone
Parenting styles significantly impact a child’s growth and development. While authoritative, permissive, and positive styles offer distinct approaches, there is no single best parenting style that suits every child or family. The key lies in finding a style or mix of styles that align with your values, promote healthy communication, and nurture your child’s emotional and cognitive development.
Regardless of the parenting style you use, it’s important to remember that you don’t have to do it all by yourself. In fact, a healthy support system with multiple caregivers exposes your children to valuable social interactions, learning opportunities, and daily routines. Plus, it models self-care for your child by showing them what it looks like to take healthy breaks and spend time on your own career, personal life, hobbies, and more. By being mindful of your parenting choices and seeking help when needed, you can provide the best environment for your child’s well-being.